Crocheted Hair Bows

Tags

,

I’m finally opening that shop I’ve vaguely mentioned on and off. What am I selling, you ask? 

Brown Hair Bow

 

Green Hair Bows

 

Purple Hair Bow

 

Image

 

 

Hair Bows!!! 

You can click the pics to link directly to the items or click here: Muttix’s Shop

But that’s not all (yes, I’m totally hitting you with some infomercial speak right now)!!!

In honor of my grand opening (YAY!!) if you buy two bows, you get the third one free. Don’t add it to the cart, just message me with your color choice and I’ll add it to your order. 

Excuse me whilst I go turn some cartwheels of excitement!!!

30+ Free Sites to Make Your Own Baby Food

Tags

, ,

The updated version of my first book has gone live in the Kindle store!!

30+ Free Sites to Make Your Own Baby Food

If you want to make your own baby food but don’t know where to start this is the book for you! The updated version includes a quick overview of making baby food at the beginning of the book. In the next section, you’ll find 30+ links to free websites that tell you how to make your own baby food including recipes, supply lists, picture tutorials, and one even links to a free video tutorial! There is also a link to a site where you can purchase baby food making supplies.

If you like the book please remember to rate it and give a review!

Happy reading!

Abused? Well Why Didn’t You Just Leave?

I saw a video on Upworthy today.

Stare Into Her Eyes — Now Watch One Year In An Abusive Relationship Happen In One Minute (The link is to a vid that might trigger some, but the marks, etc. were done w/makeup.)

Some of the comments on the page where I saw it linked disgusted me but sadly, didn’t surprise me.

“Why didn’t she leave?” 

“I would never let someone do that to me.”

“She’s so stupid for staying through that.”

“She must have zero self-esteem.”

… and so on. But the problem here is that no one wants to think about where this comes from. I have to think that when people make these type of comments they are imagining a scenario that goes somewhat like this: 

Two people meet. They hit it off and go out on a date. At some point in the subsequent relationship one of them suddenly hits the other in the face, starts calling them names, rapes them, or all of the above. 

But it doesn’t happen like that. I don’t think you paid attention to that so I’m going to say it again and bold that shit. 

It doesn’t happen like that.

It isn’t something that just comes out of the blue. It starts off with something simple. An argument wherein one or the other drops the F bomb. Or maybe sex got a little past the limit of comfort but it was still within bounds so it was brushed off. Because (and imagine that I’m loudly proclaiming this because using all caps annoys the crap out of me) if it were to happen out of the blue with something drastic anyone would leave.

The woman that you see at the grocery store cringing behind the man who tells his ‘bitch’ to hurry up would leave. Your friend who told you she was ending her marriage due to the abuse you didn’t know was happening would leave. The women who you see on the news, pronounced dead at the scene, with their abusive partners on the loose and under investigation would fucking leave

But abuse doesn’t happen that way. Abuse sneaks up on you, thief in the night, ready to steal the very essence of what gives you the will to live. You start off a normal human being but by the end of it you feel a shell of who you used to be. Ugly, fat, unwanted, stupid, pathetic, someone who no one would want. You fear the loss of your children, your home, your very life if you were to leave. Since people don’t generally walk around talking about their abusive relationships in the light of day for anyone to hear, the person has likely been convinced (by themselves and by their partner) that they are crazy, unworthy, irrational, bitchy, stupid, and unworthy.

See that I mentioned unworthy there twice? I know, I’m sneaky like that. But that’s how it is. There is a mantra going on inside the head of someone who has experienced abuse. They are systematically broken down. Day after day it is ground into them that they are not worth the love or attention of anyone. That the abuser is, in fact, doing them a favor by being with them. 

And here’s the kicker. When it reaches that point where the chick considers getting out there’s always that little voice in their head reminding them of what will happen. 

“How is the husband/boyfriend?” says random person/friend/family member.

“Oh, we’re getting divorced/broke up”

“Why???” 

“He was abusive.”

Now at this point there are two expected reactions. Either there will be a sudden drop in temperature from the sneer of condescension or the pity train rolls into town. Either way the person gets to, once again, feel something that another person puts on her. Humiliation. Loss of respect. 

Abuse is not something that can be put in a blog post and explained away between quips. It happens every day, somewhere, to someone. Right now, while I’m typing this and later, while you’re reading, someone is getting hurt whether it is physically or emotionally. Someone is locked in a bathroom sobbing after being sexually punished by a person claims that they love them. Someone is crying (or holding in the tears lest they make it worse) while being told how disgusting they are. Or you know what? Someone might be dead. 

While people are busy blaming the victim, playing the ‘I’d never‘ game, someone out there is silent because not only was her voice taken by someone who was supposed to love her but it was trampled by the rest of the folks who were supposed to care. The answer is always the same when a person tries to (however subtly) talk about the wrongs in their relationship.

“You should leave.”

Easier said than done. What about the stay at home mom who has been convinced that she is an idiot and a bad mother, incapable of caring for her children and thus the courts will allow the asshole (yes, the asshole. If you can’t take the language, don’t come to this blog because like Bernie Mac I’m going to tell it like it T. I. is.) full custody. She’s convinced that with no money and no record of abuse (how do you even begin to document sexual abuse? Verbal? Mental?) she will lose her children. 

And how about the woman who was raised in a religious environment where the breaking of a marriage is sin? Telling her to ‘get over it’ doesn’t cut it when she feels it would be risking her immortal soul to do so. Whatever your personal views on the afterlife or lack thereof, take a moment and ponder what it would be like to live in fear of burning for untold years. It is real to the person and you’ve got to respect that. 

But enough of that. Why am I posting this? For two reasons. First, before you jump to conclusions the next time you see a woman with a broken arm struggling to unload her kid from the backseat while her husband stands to the side, useless, give her a smile. Before you cut your friend off mid-sentence as she’s bemoaning the night before when her boyfriend told her she was ugly and stupid to tell her to leave the jackass already, take a moment. Breathe. Give her a smile and a compliment. Let her know that she’s not alone. She’s not stupid. She’s not ugly. She, your friend, your acquaintance, your relative sparkles brighter than the sparkles on a Twilight vamp and you love her like you love bacon. 

Because you never know. The next time he raises his hand or voice in anger she may not hear him at all. She might hear you. Telling her to shine bright like the fucking diamond she is. And she might just take that chance and then she might, just maybe, leave. Not because you told her to leave. Not because you judged her or pitied her. But because you took a moment to remind her that she fucking rocks.

And second, I wrote this for you. The chick reading this who minimizes her screen every time her dude ambles past. The woman on her lunch break who might have felt the twinge of tears behind your eyelids as you remembered last night, or this morning. The dude who doesn’t think that he can say anything because ‘men don’t get abused’. 

I’m not going to tell you to leave. I’m certainly not telling you to stay. But I am telling you this. Whoever you are, and however trite you may think this, you fucking rock. 

You are smart

You are beautiful (or hot as hell if you’re a dude). 

You have talent, you are a diamond. Whether that’s buried in a lump of charcoal right now or not, it doesn’t matter. Because you are you. The only ‘you’ this world will ever know. And your partner, the person who loves you but hurts you? They aren’t worthy of you

You rolled your eyes at that and brushed me off, didn’t you? I’m going to say it again (and this time I’m pulling out the fucking caps). 

THEY AREN’T WORTHY OF YOU.

I can’t tell you that everything will be alright. I can’t tell you that it will be easy or fun. But I can tell you this. One day, after you get you back you will wake up free. You will sigh in contentment because you realize that you no longer have to walk around on eggshells lest you set the asshole off. You will have meals that you want to eat, where you want them, how you like them. The whole day will be choices that you make for you, not what you have to do to try and keep someone happy to keep them from hurting you, scaring you, or belittling you. 

You will go to bed with a smile on your face and you will think to yourself, ‘I fucking rock.’ 

And that, you diamond (in the rough or not), is why I wrote this blog post. With the hope that just one of you who reads it will think to yourself that you rock. Because you deserve it. No matter what you’ve been told or shown, you deserve happiness and the ability to live a full day without pain. 

You are worthy. You are worth it.

Now start living it. Because you rock. No matter what you’ve been told, no matter what you’ve been shown.

And if you feel the need to chat, contact me. I won’t judge, I won’t pressure you. Because I know what it’s like to scream into the wind and only hear your voice echoing back.

Donate a Hat to Everybody Needs a Hat!

Winter is coming up fast and with it, the need for warmer clothes. I have often felt sad for the children I see running around my city without proper winter gear. But what can I do about it? Not much since I don’t have the extra funds to clothe them all.

Or so I thought. Actually, there is something I can do and you too! I just started a fund on GoFundMe so that instead of sitting around wishing this winter season, I can do something about it.

Want to help out? It only costs $5 for one hat, the price of a grande frap at Starbucks! Check it out and pitch it what you can. Every dollar counts!

Donate a hat!

And don’t be fooled by the levels. I just put those in to make it easy to donate but every dollar goes towards warming up a child. Donate a dollar, donate $100. Whatever you can afford, the children of Dallas, Texas thank you!

Click here to donate!

By the way, you rock. Thanks for keeping a kid warm this season!

Grandpa

I was thinking about my grandpa today. He was a quiet man without a lot to say. Generally he was agreeing with my grandma when he did speak. I have no idea how he lived his life. I don’t know any of his experiences save the ones that I shared with him.

But I know he was a good man. He was a hardworking man who planted cacti around the perimeter of the gates of his houses as a security measure. He owned two houses, one for him and my grandma and one for family members to stay in. And they did. Whoever needed a home found one with help from my grandpa.

He liked his food spicy and discouraged my brother from eating it because of the hot sauce that he’d pour on top. When my one year old brother reached up to his plate and began eating with enthusiasm my grandpa quietly looked at him and then nodded and they shared the rest of that plate. They shared a lot of plates after that with my brother having some kind of sixth sense when my grandpa was having a meal and my grandpa accepting his presence with stoic silence, as was his way.

He hugged me when my grandma died and I saw real pain on his face for the first time in my life.

And when he died when I was 14, I cried so hard and incessantly that my parents had my best friend’s mother drive her over to comfort me.

I cried because I missed him but also because I wasn’t sure he knew that I loved him.

Tell the people you love how you love them. Every day remember to cherish the ones you love and more importantly, let them know. With the world in disarray and always on the go it is tough to remember to love.

Stop Bitching and WRITE Already!

Tags

, ,

So I’m sitting here thinking about how I should write, how I want to write, but how I have nothing to write about and nothing to say. Basically I’ve been in a slump for awhile now (as my lack of blogging attests) and just haven’t found the mojo to get out of it. I’d been blaming the muse for awhile because well… It’s better than admitting that I just don’t have the juice. Then something happened.

My sister came over and in talking about television shows we ended up on the subject of Amanda Hocking. I’m not going to go into the weird way that our minds work though it is something akin to this scene from Gilmore Girls:

That’s basically what happens when we get together. Anyhow so she came over and we ended up talking about Amanda Hocking and her success as a writer. At some point I may or may not have been cackling and rubbing my hands together announcing my plans to take over the world. That’s when it happened. As I was loudly informing her that I too could (and would!) write a book in fifteen days I started to seek her opinion on a story that I’ve had bumping around in the back of my mind for a bit now.

Is it the story that I’ve been writing and working on for many, many months in hopes of someday finishing it? Nope. That story still sits (unfinished) in my writing folder. Was it another story also already begun and just waiting on finishing touches? Absolutely not. What this is, is the story that I want to read. So I started pitching the idea to her and then ended up asking her opinion. What happened next was writing magic.

After not getting out a single sentence (alright so I’m embellishing the facts. Isn’t that what good writers do?) for light years I sat down and did something I haven’t done since high school. I wrote an outline. It started as just wanting to capture her input and notes on my story and ended up with a lot of pitching ideas back and forth and getting the first three scenes outlined.

I discovered something magical (paranormal?) about writing tonight. Sometimes you have to stop bitching about the process and just sit down and write. You might find that block you thought was in the path between you and brilliance was naught but a stone that you could easily sidestep on your journey to taking over the world.

Take over the WORLD

Felt Food for Christmas

Tags

, , ,

Belle has firmly hit the stage where she’s in love with play food. She’s going to be ecstatic on Christmas when she finds this under the tree:

To help her fully enjoy her kitchen (that, might I add, is better than mine!) I’m going to make her some food to go along with it.

Sliced bread

 

Romaine lettuce leaves

 

Tomato slices

 

Cheese slices

 

 

Brown bag lunch

 

Popsicles

Candy cane

Cookies

Doughnut

Bacon

Carrot

Tortilla chips

Pizza slice

Banana and slices

Reading These Past Months

Tags

,

The last time I did a “Reading This Month” it was April and the year looked a lot longer… Once again, December has arrived and I’m scrambling to make goals and complete activities. On that note, I’m going to jump right in.

38.   Deadlocked by Charlaine Harris (Sookie Stackhouse #12)

39.    Hammered by Kevin Hearne (Iron Druid Chronicles #3)

40.    Beauty Sleep by Cameron Dokey

41.    Anna Dressed in Blood by Kendare Blake (Anna #1)

42.  Double by Jenny Valentine

43.   Bad Blood by Kristen Painter (House of Comarre #3)

44.    Dark Lover by J.R. Ward (Black Dagger Brotherhood #1)

45. -53.                  The Calling, Changeling, Strife, Seeker, Origins, Eclipse, Reckoning, Full Circle, Night’s Child by Cate Tiernan

54.    Ex Libris: Confessions of a Common Reader by Anne Fadiman

55.     Wither by Lauren DeStefano (The Chemical Garden #1)

56.      Fever by Lauren DeStefano (The Chemical Garden #2)

57.      Die for Me by Amy Plum (Revenants #1)

58.     Not a Genuine Black Man by Brian Copeland

59.     Skinwalker by Faith Hunter (Jane Yellowrock #1)

60.     Stolen into Slavery by Judith Bloom Fradin

61.     What I Talk About When I Talk About Running by Haruki Murakami

62.     Kitty and the Midnight Hour by Carrie Vaughn (Kitty Norville #1)

63.     Make Every Man Want You by Marie Forleo

64.     Kitty Goes to Washington by Carrie Vaughn (Kitty Norville #2)

65.     Need by Carrie Jones (Need #1)

66.     Stray by Rachel Vincent (Shifters #1)

67.     Witches of East End by Melissa de la Cruz

68.     Rogue by Rachel Vincent (Shifters #2)

69.     Black Blade Rules by J. A. Pitts (Sarah Beauhall #1)

70.     Tricked by Kevin Hearne (The Iron Druid Chronicles #4)

71.     Paranormalcy by Kiersten White (Paranormalcy #1)

72. – 75.          Kitty Takes a Holiday, Kitty and the Silver Bullet, Kitty and the Dead Man’s Hand, Kitty Raises Hell by Carrie Vaughn (Kitty Norville #3 – 6)

76.     Red-Headed Stepchild by Jaye Wells (Sabina Kane #1)

77.     Part Wild by Ceiridwen Terrill

78.     Cell 3116 or How to Marry a Loser Without Even Trying by Dee Sanderson

79.     Shadow of Night by Deborah Harkness (All Souls Trilogy #2)

80.     Secrets of a Webcam Girl by Annabelle Baxter

81.     Vicious Circle by Linda Robertson (Persephone Alcmedi #1)

82.     Kitty’s House of Horrors by Carrie Vaughn (Kitty Norville #7)

83.     The Mage in Black by Jaye Wells (Sabina Kane #2)

84.     Jane Bites Back by Michael Thomas Ford (Jane Fairfax #1)

85.     The Forgotten Garden by Kate Morton

86.     Robopocalypse by Daniel H. Wilson

87.     A Brush of Darkness by Allison Pang (Abby Sinclair #1)

88.     Kitty Goes to War by Carrie Vaughn (Kitty Norville #8)

89.     Jane Goes Batty by Michael Thomas Ford (Jane Fairfax #2)

90.     Hallowed Circle by Linda Robertson (Persephone Alcmedi #2)

91.     Green-Eyed Demon by Jaye Wells (Sabina Kane #3)

92.     A Sliver of Shadow by Allison Pang (Abby Sinclair #2)

93.     Silver-Tongued Devil by Jaye Wells (Sabina Kane #4)

94.     City of Bones by Cassandra Clare (The Mortal Instruments #1)

95.     Blue-Blooded Vamp by Jaye Wells (Sabina Kane #5)

Somehow I got my count wrong and thus I’m behind. However, I won’t let that deter me from my goal. I still have a couple weeks left, I believe I can finish five books in that time. Happy reading!

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 618 other followers